Dear family and friends.
Many of you have asked for an update on the boys and are gracious to ask us how you can pray. Here's the brief background I can share. The boys have been with us for just over a year now. It has been the most challenging year in our lives so far, but we have seen the wonderful blessing of facing challenges as Christians who believe that there isn't such a thing as chance, luck, or fate but there is a faithful Father in Heaven who cares about every detail so that "not even a hair can fall from our heads without the will of our Father in Heaven". We have understood our sinfulness even more. We've seen our selfishness in a new way when we are put out by a child throwing temper tantrums throughout the night. We have realized our pride when another Sunday School class went poorly and we're embarrassed. We've struggled with anger when a rare date night gets cut short because of trouble back home. The more we realize our sin, the more we understand the grace we've been given in Jesus Christ who died for our transgressions and has secured for us a reward that has far greater weight than even all our worst days this past year put together. We realize this isn't cancer, or a stroke, or a divorce, or a death, but it has been hard and messy. There have been amazing rewards as well. We have enjoyed these new characters in our house. We've gotten to see all the "firsts" in the first year of a little boy's life. We've seen our kids adapt to new challenges and less individual attention. In short, after a year, we've all fallen in love with a couple new people in our family and the challenges have been totally worth it.
So, on Monday morning around 9 am this process reaches a bit of a climax when there is a termination hearing before the judge. This hearing will determine the boys' mother's fitness to continue as their mom. The State of Michigan, along with the foster care agency, plans to argue that she has not shown that she has the capacity to provide a safe and nurturing home that will promote their wellbeing. We have been warned that her defense is based on two premises: 1. That the agency did not do their job in rehabilitating her and 2. That we as foster parents have sabotaged the process by not fostering the bond between the boys and their mom in order to steal them from her. You can see how this will be difficult to quietly sit through. If the judge agrees with the State, the mom's rights will be severed and, as the judge has put it, "she will be no different than a stranger to them". At that point, an adoption process would begin. If mom "wins" then the reunification process resumes and she gets more time to meet the criteria she has so far been unable to meet. Based on everything that has happened, our case worker would be shocked if the termination didn’t go through.
So here's the prayer we are praying. You can pray it with us as you read or add to it as the Holy Spirit leads you:
Lord, you are gracious, majestic, immense, and unfathomable. Yet, you condescended to send your son Jesus to fix this mess of sin we're in and reveal truth in such a clear way. We know we all fall short. Some of us have hidden sins that few people, or maybe only you can see. Some of us have been victims of the awful effects of sin that tear families apart. Some of us seem to receive blessing upon blessing. We know that it was no work of our own that merited it, but in your wisdom you gave us wonderful parents, friends that stick closer than brothers, a nurturing church that preaches truth every Sunday to satisfy our weary souls and hem us in to the narrow way, a stable marriage, and financial security. Were it not for your grace, we would have sin so entangling us that WE would be unfit to care for our children. But, you give us life and mercies that are new every morning. You have been faithful even when we grumble against our real or perceived injustices. Thank you for your grace. You told us in your word that to whom much has been given, much will be expected. You have given us so much. We assume you expect a lot too, and we take comfort knowing that your Holy Spirit will give us power to do the good works you prepared in advance for us to do.
Lord, give us strength to endure any false accusations. Grant us peace in our hearts in the face of any injustice. Let us feel the weight of your glory making light our brief and momentary afflictions. You are the perfect and just judge. Your truth reigns in every courtroom, every home, and we pray every heart. May we bend our knee now to you as we know every knee will one day bend in the presence of your glory. Lets us not be afraid to give this testimony to all those we have the privilege to come into contact with and not just our family and friends that make it easy to pray like this.
Lord, we have fallen in love with these boys and we can't imagine saying good bye to them. It might make our days easier, but our hearts would break. We pray that you would save their souls. And give them a knowledge of the truth that will turn their hearts of stone into hearts of flesh that will have the capacity to believe that only you can solve their biggest problem by your grace. If you would give us the privilege to be part of that process for their whole lives, we would be grateful. If just for this year or two, then help us to be grateful.
In all these circumstances, let us rejoice in the Lord, always. To you alone be all the glory, for no one deserves it like you do. AMEN.
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Thanks for praying with us and for being part of the great cloud of witnesses that spurs us on to love and good deeds. We couldn't do this without you and we praise God for you all. May even this somehow encourage you in the "trials" you might be facing on Monday!
Love,
Nick and Carissa
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